Our miscarriage was one year ago today. Noah only lived for eight short weeks, but we know that his or her little life was no less precious to our Heavenly Father! I have been so helped by reading other’s stories of loss and hope, and pray that Noah’s story will bring encouragement to someone else walking through pregnancy or infant loss.
For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.
-Psalm 139:13-16 ESV
One year ago you had the joy of meeting Jesus in the glorious, real place called heaven. We think of you so often and wonder what amazing things you are experiencing there! While we don’t know every detail of your heavenly existence, there is so much we know with certainty: that despite your tiny frame, God already knew everything about you and loved you. He formed you in His image to be an everlasting soul. He saved you through the sacrifice of His own precious Son Jesus, who conquered the grave and is alive forever, reigning in victory.
Worthy is the Lamb who was slain,
Worthy is the King who conquered the grave!
-Phil Wickham, “This Is Amazing Grace”
Your Heavenly Father didn’t care that you were small or sick or still in Mommy’s belly. He is sovereign over all things; no life escapes His notice or His love. Because of these great promises, and so many more, we know we will meet you one day in heaven. What a glorious reunion it will be!
And he will swallow up on this mountain the covering that is cast over all peoples, the veil that is spread over all nations. He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken. It will be said on that day, “Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us. This is the Lord; we have waited for him; let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.” -Isaiah 25:7-9 ESV
You only lived for eight weeks in my womb, but your little life changed us so much. Heaven is closer now, not merely a future destination but a glorious reality we think about often. We love studying what the Bible says about heaven and imagining what it will be like there. Your story helps us tell people about God’s faithfulness in the face of tragedy, darkness, and fear. Your siblings will understand God’s promises better because of you. We wish we could have you with us, but we know that God is using our separation for His glory right now, and that this time is brief in light of eternity. Because of you, we have more joy and hope as we face our everyday struggles because we see a small glimpse of the bigger picture of God’s amazing rescue plan!
I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. -Isaiah 46:4b NIV
We have plenty of hard days. Sometimes anxiety and fear take root in our hearts, sometimes we are numbed by the demands of earthly life. Sometimes we are just tired and overwhelmed and it is easy to forget God’s promises. But when we remember you rejoicing in heaven, radiant in the light of your Savior, we are encouraged—because we know that we too have an everlasting hope.
On you was I cast from my birth, and from my mother’s womb you have been my God. -Psalm 22:10 ESV
Happy Heaven Day, sweet Noah! Love from Mommy, Daddy, big brother and little sister on the way <3
…But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before. -C. S. Lewis, The Last Battle
Friends, thank you so much for stopping by and reading about our journey through miscarriage. I would love to write a post with more resources for those walking a similar path, hopefully soon. Until then, I highly recommend Randy Alcorn’s book Heaven, which has encouraged us so much.